youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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