I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
