the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
These Attractive Criminals Took Sexy Mugshots That Made Them Famous
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
This Girl’s Unbelievable Catfish Story Will Make You Rethink Online Dating
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed