she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
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