I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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