Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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