He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
He felt like a one man threesome
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
