i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
