He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
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