Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
you had me at cake vodka
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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