how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
