Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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