he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
