Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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