she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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