Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Dick very happy bro
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
