So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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