But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
