Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
