I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Randomize
