There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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