she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
