Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize