Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
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