Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
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