I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
We had to coat check the pizza.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
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