I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
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