flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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