Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(708): View more from Illinois

Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy

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(651): View more from Minnesota

This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it

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(808): View more from Hawaii

mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.

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(913): View more from Kansas

Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.

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(919): View more from North Carolina

Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.

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(949): View more from California

so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment

(214): View more from Texas

yah I won't allow him in my apartment

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(310): View more from California

thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races

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