I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He has the fingertips of a God
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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