cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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