I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
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Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
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My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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