I could have mohawked her pubes.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Even my vagina gasped.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
