I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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