new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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