We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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