I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I'm experimenting with sincerity
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
