so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
