You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
