I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
