Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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