Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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