Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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