The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
