sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
