so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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