i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
