they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize
