Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
