My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
