im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Randomize
